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"We're in a warehouse at 1:00am, I need you to know that." ― Ally Beardsley, directly into the camera
Chaos in the Cathedral is the sixth episode of season 5, A Crown of Candy.
After a secret from King Amethar's past is revealed, the Taste Buds attempt to escape the Cathedral of Saint Arugula alive. It's a tough fight, but Theobald is able to Fly up to the second level with Ruby and Liam in hand to save them, with a little help from Lapin. With some difficulty, they are able to break through the thick stone-lined window and escape to the streets of Comida, though some rather precious items are left behind.
Recap[]
"Last we left our intrepid heroes, they were in the Cathedral of Saint Arugula with King Amethar and the Lady Plumbeline's hand on the book of Saint Citrina of Candia, which compelled them to tell the truth. Hinted at, long before at the banquet, on your arrival in Comida, turns out that King Amethar did have a girl in the Dairy Islands stashed away. More than have her, he married her, Catherine Ghee, a commoner, which he told no one."
"In the back of the Cathedral is Manta Ray Jack, in shackles, and compelled to speak the truth, the Pontifex asked clearly if King Amethar was married still, and he was, and the marriage was never annulled, meaning there was no binding marriage to Caramelinda. Jet and Ruby Rocks are indeed bastards, unable to inherit land or title. And after excommunicating King Amethar for the sins of adultery and of deception, being an oath-breaker, taking a false oath during his marriage to Caramelinda, Amethar also lost the ability to hold land or title, meaning that the kingship, the Crown of Candia, passed hundreds of miles away to Duke Joren Jawbreaker, in open rebellion. Which means that Candia is immediately withdrawn from the Concord, and in fact at war with the Concord."
"At that point the Pontifex told the guards to seize them."
Synopsis[]
Princess Jet Rocks, enraged by Pontifex Belizabeth Brassica, charges towards her with the intent to hurt her. Jet is protected from an opportunity attack by a fry guard thanks to Sir Theobald Gumbar's reaction. Jet also uses Shield as a reaction to protect herself from the fry guard's Sentinel-like reaction to stop her movement. Jet then uses her Action Surge to move further and stab the Pontifex with her water-steel dagger. The Pontifex uses a legendary resistance to resist the poison effect of the dagger.
King Amethar of House Rocks searches for exits. He sees the Imperial Guards locking up all of the doors but sees that the windows as their only possible exit. King Amethar commands The Tartguard to push back the Imperial Guards. Jet tells Amethar that she wants to keep fighting for him, but King Amethar begs her to take her sister Ruby and run because he does not want them to die for him. King Amethar then goes into a rage and throws Jet up into the balcony of the cathedral. On the balcony, Jet sees numerous priests armed with bows aiming at both her and the Candians. The priest archers shoot arrows at Jet, Ruby, and Liam on their turn. Liam first asks Lord Consort Rufus Applebottom in Fructerano if he is truly against the Candians. Applebottom tells Liam that he was to side with the Candians, he would endanger the people of Fructera. Both Liam and Preston go up against the fry guard and attack him. Sir Keradin Deeproot then emerges from the shadows and hits Liam twice. The Tartguard run towards the Imperial Guards and take dodge actions to protect the Candians. Lady Plumbeline Uvano hits Theobald and deals damage to him.
Chancellor Lapin Cadbury first goes to Basha Myaso and taunts him, asking Basha if he's willing to let King Amethar have all of the glory in fighting against The Bulb but fails to convince him. Lapin takes a free action on gaining insight into The Bulb's relationship with its people. Lapin sees that the Pontifex's relationship with The Bulb is similar to his relationship with The Sugar-Plum Fairy. He also sees that a cleric's relationship with their deities is no different from a warlock's relationship with their deity; it's just a matter of style of what a cleric or warlock calls themselves. Lapin takes his turn to cast Fly on Theobald so that Theobald could carry either Liam or Ruby up to the balcony on his turn. Lapin then steps in between Liam and Sir Keradin and uses a bonus action to heal Liam. Lapin doesn't hide his spell-casting since there's no point in deception anymore. Theobald tells Lapin that he's touched by his actions and that he misjudged him but Lapin grumpily responds "Oh, shut up."
Ruby uses a Cunning Action: Disengage to get up onto the altar and uses Sour Scratch to shoot at the Pontifex. Ruby also uses Sour Scratch's Grasping Arrow ability on the Pontifex. She is successful in her attack, restraining the Pontifex. Theobald looks to Amethar for instruction, to which the forsaken king replies, "take my daughters and run." Sir Gumbar leaps into action, calling for sprinkle, and picking up a gravely injured Liam. He leaves Liam on the upper balcony with Jet, flying back down to scoop up Ruby and place her on the balcony as well.
On the Pontifex's turn, she seemingly prays to the Bulb, as Amethar looms above her. She runs passed Amethar, taking much damage from the grasping vines, as well as an attack of opportunity from the King as she leaves his threatened area. Dispite her prayers, all attacks on her land. The Tartguard have been commanded by their king to hold off the imperial guard, and five of them fall immediately to Commander Grissini and his soldiers.
Jet attacks a soldiers in front her, attempting to break the windows with his body. The windows, however, have cement beams running through them, meaning that breaking them would be a great feat of strength. Breaking the windows to escape is a near impossible task, and many things would need to go right in order to break the windows enough to slip through. Realizing this, Jet instead shoves her attacker over the railing.
Amethar leaps after the Pontifex, grappling her, yelling out to the surrounding enemies, "I have your leader, will you not defend her?" The rising panic in his voice gives him away as he fails to intimidate them. He instead attacks Belizabeth, who is not looking well. The surrounding soldiers close in around Amethar, raining blows on him. The archbishop Onionpatch runs up to the Pontifex, ripping her out of the Kings grasp and dashing away.
Sir Keradin turns and swings on Lapin, calling him a false prophet before dropping him to zero. Lapin, who is now making death saving throws, sees the truth on the nature of the Bulb; the Bulb is mindless. Although it is a source of power that people may call on, it possesses no intelligence or awareness at all. It simply, is. People are capable of accessing it, as Lapin can tap in to the Sugar-Plum Fairy, but it has no sentience. Lapin fails his first death save.
Ruby uses her mage hand to throw a rope to Amethar, and casts a fog cloud around him, hoping to shield him from attacks as much as possible. Theo holds the other side of the rope, but Amethar, in the thick fog, isn't able to catch the it for Theo to pull him up. Theobald runs at the window, but fails to break it. The Pontifex heals herself of most of her injuries, continuing to run as the knights swing at Amethar again. The King has taken an immense amount of damage, barely standing. Things are looking quite dire for the Chancellor, who is surrounded by enemies, prone on the floor. Jet uses a maneuvering attack to throw a dagger at an enemy archer, and instruct her father to move. Her shout grants Amethar a free disengage, allowing him to pull himself onto the balcony with the rope nearby without taking any opportunity attacks. He immediately runs for the window, swinging Payment Day into the stone, damaging the cement braces.
The knights and archers begin swarming the hatches to get up to the balcony.
Liam sends Peppermint Preston down to Lapin to try and help him, then turns to attempt to damage the windows further. He cannot do so.
Sir Keradin, seeing Preston laying atop Lapin, kills Peppermint Preston.
Ruby attempts to use mage hand to release Manta Ray Jack from his shackles. With two nat ones, she ends up accidentally making his situation worse.
Theobald successfully rams through the window, takes a short fall to the ground, and prepares to help everyone out of the Cathedral. With the window now open, Jet grabs onto Liam, cushioning his fall as he is gravely injured. Amethar observes that they will be able to escape without a distraction, the fight having only lasted a few minutes in real time, and no imperial soldiers are waiting for them outside. He looks down to Lapin's body, pausing only for a moment before leaping out the window. Theobald catches his king, taking the damage for him. Now outside of the Cathedral, the party looks through the windows at the gruesome scene unfolding.
The Pontifex approaches Lapin, prostrate on the floor, as Keradin lifts his mace. Lapin, with blood in his eyes, observes one last thing; not only does Belizabeth Brassica not know whether or not the Bulb is real or sentient, she does not care. She gets what she wants from the Bulb, which is power. The Pontifex asks Lapin for his last words, which he replies, "the Bulb cares for no one." She quickly turns to Keradin, and instructs him to end it.
The Candians watch, as with a sickening splatter of chocolate, Lapin is no more.
With no time to mourn their losses, bloody and battered, the party flees into the city of Comida.
Locations[]
Featured Characters[]
The Taste Buds[]
- King Amethar of House Rocks
- Princess Jet Rocks
- Princess Ruby Rocks
- Sir Theobald Gumbar
- Chancellor Lapin Cadbury
- Liam Wilhelmina
Returning[]
Mentioned[]
- Duke Joren Jawbreaker
- Lord Calroy Cruller
- Lady Donetta Cruller
- Lord Finnegan Swirlie
- Lady Swirlie
- Queen Caramelinda of House Rocks
- Catherine Ghee
Trivia[]
- When designing this encounter, Brennan considered the possibility that only Jet and Ruby would make it out alive. The cathedral windows are nearly impossible to break, so the idea was that only the two princesses would be able to slip through the broken windows.
- Brennan also stated in an Instagram Live, had the players peacefully surrendered instead of fighting and escaping, they would have been arrested and sent to Super Jail, most likely ending in a TPK.
- This episode features Dimension 20's first PC perma-death mid-way through the campaign in which the PC does not return.