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Are you my dad? Am I my OWN dad!? |
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WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING!? WHAT DID YOU JUST DO!? |
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"I never thought I'd be so relieved to see bread." ― Emily Axford
Commander Constano Grissini is a commander in the Imperial army. He leads a battalion of Ceresian soldiers.
Featured Episodes[]
| Episodes Featuring Grissini |
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A Crown of Candy
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Description[]
Commander Grissini is a tall, young, clean-shaven Ceresian breadstick man. He is a Centurion for the Imperial army, dressed in Roman sandals that go up to his knee and a Centurion breastplate. He carries a spear as a weapon.
Grissini is incredibly dedicated to his job, to the point of potentially resigning had anyone been killed when the party is attacked by brigands on the Sucrosi Road. He is a religious man, a worshiper of the Bulb, and suspicious of magic users, such as Princess Ruby.
History[]
Ambush on the Sucrosi Road[]
Commander is first officially introduced as he and his men rush in to help the party towards the end of their battle on the Sucrosi Road. It was previously mentioned by Lord Calroy Cruller that he would be waiting at the border of Candia to escort them to the capital of Comida. He gives Sir Theobald Gumbar a quick nod as he rushes into combat.
During the battle, Liam Wilhelmina yells to him and his men that King Amethar is lying, dying, in the middle of the magical fog cast by Princess Ruby Rocks. He orders his men after the archers that are attacking the King, and announces, in perfect Candian, that they're friends of the King.
He aids Princess Jet Rocks in felling one of the last of the attacking brigands. He gives her several buffs: 1d4 for attacks and saves, and an immediate melee attack, which she gets free advantage on, since he's within 10 feet of her, which cancels out the disadvantage from the fog. He hits the enemy's weapon away, but instead of going for the kill-shot himself, brings his spear down and brings his head down right in front of Jet for her to stab. Without thinking, he claps her on the back and commends her skill, before running off to keep fighting.
Development sketch by season artist Samir Barrett: "Only thing that got changed really is Grissini's hair which ended up spikey."
When the battle concludes, he apologizes to King Amethar that his forces had to suffer the injuries that they did because of his late arrival. He commends Jet's fighting again, and he learns that she is in fact the King's daughter. He apologizes profusely, but Jet assures him that she's more of a "princess of the people". He tells her that he, too, considers himself a soldier of the people. He sends his men to help recover the fallen Tartguard, and they all survive.
Grissini thanks Chancellor Lapin Cadbury, as a Primogen of the church, for any miracles he may have worked there today, as it was surely a miracle that no one died. Lapin notices that he seems suspicious of Ruby and her spell casting, and attempts to cover for her, claiming that she too has been touched by the Bulb. Despite being a Box of Doom roll, it is unknown if Grissini saw through this ploy or not.
Keep Sharp[]
After the battle, Grissini tells King Amethar how grateful he is that everyone survived, or else he would have surely laid down his spear and resigned. Amethar assures him that they were doing just fine by themselves. Grissini agrees, noting that he must have unleashed Payment Day.
When he notices Senator Augustus Ciabatta arrive in Comida, he stands straight at attention, regarding the Senator in a way similar to how Theobald acts towards Amethar.
The Grand Tournament[]
During the melee event at the Grand Tournament, after getting attacked by Princess Jet Rocks, he appears smitten with her abilities.
Lapin's Big Day[]
Chaos in the Cathedral[]
Escape from the Bulb Creeps[]
Grissini and his imperial soldiers board and search the Colby ship. After neither he nor the soldiers find the fugitive House of Rock members, they leave.
Rescue at Buzzybrook[]
Grissini was a main combatant in the rescue staged by House Rocks. He was in the town as the Ceresian military commander in the campaign to capture and defeat Duke Joren Jawbreaker. He was first spotted in a house by Ruby when he was talking and assumedly interrogating Jawbreaker's wife Spearia Mentha as she was held up by chains.
He is the first enemy character to know that something is happening as Brennan remarks "He's a very alert guy, yes".
At one point in the battle, Saccharina casts Lightning Bolt and he is caught in this. He is badly injured by this and shortly after taking multiple attacks from King Amethar as Saccharina quotes it was a "daddy daughter special" which was a reference to the episode 'Ambush on the Sucrosi Road' where Jet and Amethar both attacked and killed one of the House Bleu Marauders disguised as Meat People.
At the end of the battle, Ruby contemplates killing him before teleporting back to the Great Stone Candy Mountains. She chooses not to, as it would have made it impossible for her to make it to the standing stone circle in time to escape the overwhelming enemy forces.
Family Ties[]
For Candia! (Part 1)[]
For Candia! (Part 2)[]
He is killed during the battle by King Amethar of House Rocks and Duke Joren Jawbreaker causing 20% of his soldiers to flee.
Trivia[]
- His last name is a reference to Italian grissini, a type of breadstick. His first name may also be a conjugation of the Italian word 'constare', meaning 'made of'. He is Made Of Breadstick.
- His mini was sold as part of the Dimension 20 A Crown Of Candy Auction for $2,501
