"Alright everyone, follow me! We're gonna jump on them, and then we're gonna murder 'em!" ― Fabian Seacaster to the warlocks of the Cult of Old Bill just before the events of the Crow's Keep Massacre.
The Cult of Old Bill is a cult of warlocks who follow Bill Seacaster as their patron.
Background[]
Like most warlock patrons, Bill Seacaster provides his followers with magic for spells, but instead of giving it in exchange for their souls, he charges them gold in a system not unlike a pyramid scheme. At the time of the Crow's Keep Banquet, Bill's followers had given him nearly 350,000 gold pieces.
It costs 25 gold pieces to lease a cantrip for one month and 100 gold pieces for five cantrips. Spells cost 50 gold pieces per spell level. Upon joining, warlocks receive a pre-drawn infernal sacrifice scroll which is used to send Bill the money they owe. It's in a warlock's best interests to pay as soon as possible, as failure to do so provides financial incentive for other warlocks to hunt down and kill them. There is also a referral program, in which warlocks host mimosa (or bellini) brunches and show presentations in hopes of recruiting new members. Part of this scheme may also involve them stealing religious artifacts as payment in order for Bill Seacaster to use as holy ammo against his enemies in Hell.
The cult reveres Bill very highly, delighting in the fact that they don't have to give up their souls, even though they are all mostly destitute because of the arrangement. This reverence extends to Bill's son, Fabian, as well, when they learn that Bill died at his hand.
Pirates are a superstitious lot and magic is often frowned upon and punished by the residents of Leviathan, but the warlocks of the Cult of Old Bill enjoy practicing anyway. Some, such as Alistair Ash, claim that having magic improves your reputation and word of your power spreads to important people. Alistair thinks this is why Garthy O'Brien knows his name, but this is never confirmed.
History[]
Origins[]
When the Bad Kids arrived in Leviathan, the cult was still new, only about five months old, as Bill Seacaster had only recently died. They meet one of its members, Alistair Ash, at the Leviathan#Maelstrom's Maw, and are officially introduced to the cult by Garthy O'Brien. While discussing their past business with Bill, Garthy mentions that the cult of warlocks means that Bill Seacaster did not totally abandon Leviathan in the face of Captain James Whitclaw's imminent attempt to seize control and crown himself the pirate king. It's mentioned that the party may be able to make use of the cult as a sort of army.
Sometime after this and an unknown amount of time before the Crow's Keep Banquet, Alistair and several other warlocks encounter Whitclaw and exchange words: Whitclaw claims that he will kill every last one of Old Bill's followers, that the streets will run red with their blood, and it would be an end to all of them; they tell him that Fabian will kick his ass.
The Crow's Keep Banquet[]
The night that the Bad Kids arrived in Leviathan, Alistair and the rest of the Cult of Old Bill follow Fabian as he wanders up to Crow's Keep. Once there, they lift him up, singing "For He's a Jolly Good Fellow", and carry him to an abandoned but magnificent manor at the edge of the neighborhood that has half fallen into the city below. They celebrate him with a banquet and lots of food, which the warlocks eat very eagerly. One member, Chungledown Bim, stuffs a bunch of pasta into his coat.
The warlocks think that Fabian is an envoy sent by his father in their moment of doubt to save them from Captain James Whitclaw. After Alistair personally introduces a few warlocks to Fabian, Fabian climbs up onto a table to address them all at once and sets the record straight. He tells them that his father did not send him, and that he came to Leviathan of his own free will. They ask him to tell them about how he killed his father, assuming that he did so by besting him in combat. Fabian begins to tell the story about Prompocalypse, admitting that he's nervous once he starts rambling and getting side tracked, but the warlocks have so much faith in him that they believe him to be pretending.
Fabian reveals that he came across Bill Seacaster already severely injured and dying anyway, and Fabian only finished him off as a sort of symbolic gesture and thematic choice. This causes the group to become uneasy, realizing that Fabian isn't the expert swordsman they first thought him to be. They fear that they're all doomed since they had previously told Captain James Whitclaw that Fabian would kick his ass.
An unnamed warlock flings himself off the edge of Crow's Keep, shouting, "We're all gonna die!", but casts Featherfall on himself when Fabian begs no one else to jump. Fabian attempts to reassure everyone of his abilities, but seems to fall short of their expectations, instead talking about how great his friends were in defeating Kalvaxus, and admitting that it was really Riz who landed the killing blow.
An aaracockra warlock, Creaky McBarrel, interrupts to tell the group that someone is approaching, and they all rush to the windows to find that it's Captain James Whitclaw and his crew of 30 men.
The Crow's Keep Massacre[]
It's unclear to him whether or not Whitclaw and his crew are headed towards them, but Fabian decides to prove himself to the group and launch a surprise attack alongside the warlocks. With Alistair's help, he successfully persuades them to join him in battle.
Lou bursts into laughter as he and the rest of the group realize how, with the rest of the party sleeping far, far away from Crow's Keep, Fabian is very likely to get himself and everyone in the cult killed.
Fabian kicks the door to the house down, shouting Whitclaw's name as he runs outside, and attempts to stab him. He lands three attacks with the Sword of the Seacasters, missing his fourth attack, and Whitclaw draws his crystalline sword to retaliate. He swings twice and misses both times, but switches tactics to psychic attacks to grapple and stun Fabian.
He grabs Fabian's arm to pull him forward and wraps his tentacles around Fabian's face. Whitclaw's beak slides along the top of his skull as he prepares to eat Fabian's brains.
The warlocks rush out of the house and join the attack. A huge stream of gold coins erupts from the sleeve of Chungledown Bim's coat as he fires at Whitclaw with an Eldritch Blast and a cool one-liner, which thankfully lands and frees Fabian from his stun. Thankful for the save, Fabian shouts at the rest of the warlocks to use as much magic as they can, and that he'd pay for it all.
As Whitclaw's men enter the combat scene, they dive behind barrels for cover and fire their flint lock muskets into the crowd. Six warlocks die. Fabian swipes his sword at Whitclaw again, but misses. He begins to retreat into the house, realizing how hilariously outmatched they are, and risks another strike from Whitclaw's cutlass. Fabian encourages his men to keep advancing, despite retreating himself, and shoots at Whitclaw with his crossbow from the doorway of the house. The shot is blocked by a shield.
Whitclaw draws attention to Fabian's cowardice, sarcastically apologizing to the warlocks for their captain abandoning them, and attacks the crowd with a psychic blast. He raises a hand to his head and pure malevolence shoots out in a psionic force, gripping the warlocks as though with an invisible hand. Their bodies are shaken with such violence, like looking through the haze coming off a grill on the hottest day of summer, that their bodies literally fall apart. Only one unnamed warlock out of fourteen survives. Creaky McBarrel also perishes.
In the face of such disaster, all the remaining warlocks, except for Alistair Ash, flee: Old Young Benjamin jumps as high as he can and disappears into the rigging; the unnamed warlock simply vanishes into the night; and Chungledown Bim flings an attack and several insults at Fabian before also disappearing. He says that Fabian is no pirate, and that Bill would spit in his eye. When his attack of a gold coins Eldritch Blast misses, he threatens to shit in Fabian's mouth.
Alistair Ash remains loyal to the very end. He assures Fabian of his loyalty before rushing up to Whitclaw and attempting to grapple him. He is easily thrown to the ground. Fabian disengages from the fight, successfully escaping Crow's Keep via a laundry line and leaving a heartbroken Alistair behind. Alistair is assumed to have died shortly after.
Legacy[]
Only four members remain alive, including Chungledown Bim, Old Young Benjamin, the unnamed warlock who threw himself off of Crow's Keep during the banquet, and an additional unnamed warlock. The rest of Bill's followers now serve as his crew aboard the Goldenrod in Hell.
Fabian feels true regret for his actions that night.
Known members[]
- Alistair Ash: young tielfing street urchin and the first member of the cult that the Bad Kids encounter
- Chungledown Bim: snaggle-toothed gnome with a beard made of six mustaches, knew Bill Seacaster
- Old Young Benjamin: gawky, long-limbed Bandarlog, Alistair's best friend, son of Old Benjamin, older than Young Benjamin
- Young Benjamin: younger than Old Young Benjamin
- Creaky McBarrel: parrot aarakocra
- Around 16 other unnamed members