"You don't know... but you know someone who does." ― Brennan Lee Mulligan to like, every PC
Start Spreading the News, also known as D&D Meets NYC,[1] is the first episode of season 3, The Unsleeping City.
Introduction[]
"It is a snowy, blustery day. Cold, crisp, clear skies over the [thick New York accent] best fucking skyline of any city that has ever been or will ever be. It is New York City, baby. Snow flurries from the sky as the wind kicks up. We see gusts of freezing air blow past the Chrysler Building, down through streets of honking cabs and just looking miserable looking pedestrians, who crowd into the tunnels of the subways pack. All of a sudden, their winter coats trapping them in boxes of body odor and heat stuffed together on their morning commute. Down through the tunnels, a blast of laundry mixed with hot garbage and the sweet smell of the hot nuts stands."
"We go through the hellish wasteland in Times Square, up, up following snow again, over the bridge-- Brooklyn Bridge-- right here, through neighborhoods where families tuck their little bundled infants through strollers and walk down little lanes of trees. Back through neighborhoods, where again, little corner stores sell hot bacon, egg, and cheese sandwiches to morning commuters."
"We follow the wind and it's early to mid-December morning in New York City. A city where so many people dream of coming and making a life for themselves. And it's always felt a little bit like maybe, just around the corner, there's a little bit of magic."
Synopsis[]
In Greenpoint, in a "doctor's office," if one were to call it that, Pete the Plug is waiting to meet with his doctor, Lugash Primjitzki. Lugash tells him that his vitamin levels are low, and that his top surgery is healing up well. Pete then notices that the radiator is leaking, but the drops are falling onto the ceiling. In the ceiling puddle, the reflection of a poster turns to tell Pete that magic is real. Lugash returns to express to Pete that he really needs to get some rest, especially since SantaCon is today. The two banter about cocaine and Hoboken for a bit, before Lugash leaves to tend to a victim of a car accident. On the train home, Pete gets a text from 53\/3N saying that the price for a brick has gone up. He comes home to discover his landlord Marta is kicking him out for selling drugs. Pete's dad, Mitch Conlan, used a private eye to track Pete down, and when he tries to take Pete back upstate and deadname him in the process, Pete has a wild magic surge that causes bubbles to form in Mitch's mouth, lifting him into the air. Pete runs into some trashcans that start to threaten him, and he takes off down the street, before falling into a puddle. He emerges into an alternate New York, where he talks with the moon, a unicorn, a monkey-owl who kisses him, and a rat with pizza strapped to its back. He falls through to a dark place, where someone offers to make the unreal real, and vice versa. Pete says yes. This opens a gate, and a voice tells Pete to spread the news that he is out. The face of a grey child tells Pete to heed the words of Lazarus, before throwing Pete back into the real world and into the middle of SantaCon.
On Staten Island, busy at work in her beauty salon is Sofia Bicicleta. She is doing her friend's hair, but she is unable to do a good job due to her emotional instability from her husband Dale Lee leaving her. Her brother, Mario, arrives to invite her to dinner on Sunday, and the two bicker about alligator skin and fashion. After her shift, she hops on the ferry to go to a bar. She spends several hours at one, chats with Sean the bartender, destroys some dudes with terrible pick-up lines, and makes an impromptu speech at a bachelorette party. In her drunken state, she begins to be able to see the Unsleeping City and confronts some trolls who follow two of the bachelorettes outside. She beats up the trolls, shoving the heels her stilettos through one of their eyes, and after they run away down the street, she falls asleep in the trash outside.
In Cobble Hill, Ricky Matsui is rushing through a burning New York apartment building. He saves a young girl and her teddy from a fire, his questing blade allowing him to use Create Water to put out a burning beam. After a quick TV interview, Ricky gets a text from Esther Sinclair, who asks him to come to the Clinton Hill Chantry. He sprints over the rooftops of New York to Clinton Hill and meets with her, who explains the situation with SantaCon and asks him to keep a patrol and help control the Mutant Santa Clones that are about to descend on the city. On his patrol, Ricky finds Pete the Plug unconscious on the ground, with three mutant Santa clones approaching him. He fights off the clones and checks in on Pete, whose body appears to be turning into peppermint, and he carries him to St. Owen's Memorial Hospital.
In Harlem, Kingston Brown wakes up in his apartment to a feast made for him by his mother. He takes the bus, free of charge, straight to St. Owen's Memorial Hospital, where Ricky's sister Emiko tells him that Lowell Masters is waiting for him. Kingston removes the Sardianian Eagle from up Lowell's butt and tells him that there is nothing wrong with being kinky but that he should do so responsibly. He also treats several members of the Unsleeping City, including a troll from under a bridge. Eventually, Ricky rushes into the hospital with Pete, and Kingston takes them into a secret room, opened by his subway token. Kingston cures Pete of the disease from the mutant Santa, and when he does this, their magic touches, steams, unites in some kind of helix and disappears. When Kingston also identifies something darker in Pete which he is not able to treat, the two of them, along with Ricky, go to see Alejandro to find out more about what is going on.
In the subway tunnels, Kugrash is watching Wally work. He makes some chittering noises at Wally, who believes he is Jesus Christ, turned into a rat. Kugrash wanders the streets of New York, helping out homeless people and giving them food, but it dawns on him that he has not heard from Santa or received the parcel of food he usually leaves. He eventually comes across Sofia passed out in the trash and makes her some plastic bag shoes. They reintroduce themselves to each other, having met and talked before while Sofia was intoxicated. Kugrash then finds out from some cockroaches that Santa's sleigh has crashed in Central Park, and they head off to investigate. They find the sleigh, covered in peppermint smelling blood and tiny magical green ivy leaves. Kugrash notices a glyph carved into the glove compartment door of the sleigh, which he gnaws off and takes to Misty Moore.
In Broadway, Misty is signing Playbills after a preview of her new play. Alissa lets her know that an interview is about to begin in her penthouse, so Misty travels there to talk to a reporter about her role as Titania in Midsummer Nights. Upon seeing Kugrash and Sofia burst through a vent in her boiler room, Misty ushers everyone else out of the apartment. Kugrash shows Misty the Seelie glyph from the sleigh, and Misty is able to identify an infernal rune hidden under the pixie magic. They also head out to meet Alejandro who can help them read the rune.
The whole party converges at the steps of the New York Public Library, at the Gramercy Occult Society Headquarters. They meet with Alejandro and explain some of what is going on, and after Alejandro gets in contact with his granddaughters, Ana and Amelia, and discovers they are injured, he finds out that something is wrong with the Santa clones and they need help in Times Square. The party takes Kingston's bus there and they find it empty, save for the swarming SantaCon clones around a giant ice chrysalis.
Locations[]
Featured Characters[]
The Dream Team[]
New[]
Mentioned[]
- Priya Danger
- Maddie Park
- Emma Lazarus
- Dale Lee
- Isabella Infierno
- Richard
- Santa Claus
- Perry LaFev
- Don Confetti
Quotes[]
- "I found out if you microwave some cheese on a plate, you can peel it off and it's like a crispy cracker." — Pete The Plug
- "In a way I was kind of shot, cause uh... you shot my tits off."— Pete The Plug
- "In my line of work, there is not a chance to prove I am an ehljuhbittee ally, so it's nice to be able to do that." —Dr. Lugash Primjitzski
- "No, I'm not gonna read your dick because I don't read short stories!" — Sofia Bicicleta
- "What kind of camera is this?" — Ricky Matsui
- "I am a steward of New York City. I will be here until I die." — Kingston Brown
- "Wherever you are, Rat Jesus, I love you." — Wally Kugrich
- "I'm sorry, are you a rat?" — Sofia Bicicleta
- "Santa Clause is real and he's dead." — Kugrash
- "Darling, I don't study magic. I just am magic." — Misty Moore
References[]
- ↑ YouTube